Past few days

Hi Joey!
We have had a busy few days.  Of course, we are trying to fit sleep in where ever possible but we have had a lot of activities going on.  On Monday, Gramma Debbie hung out with you while I did some cleaning then Gramma Debi D came over to say goodbye.  On Tuesday, we took you for your KELLEY RYDEN PHOTO SHOOT.  You did great and sweet Jesus, I can't wait to see those photos.  Today, we went to the pediatrician and you have gained a full pound!  I can't believe it.  I am so scarred by the NICU experience that I think you are going to lose weight and have to go back.  I was so nervous and couldn't believe you gained so much in two weeks.  We also got great news - you qualify for a study that will pay for your formula for 17 months.  We love Dr. Macklem  :)

You are much more expressive now and talking a bit.  You are starting to get more of a personality.  Physically, we are so excited you haven't lost all your hair yet but we could stand to lose the ever-present ear hair  :)

Kelley let me take one photo with my phone so I will share it with you now along with some scrapbook pages I did during your shoot.

New photo

Hi baby Joey!
We went over to the Lindberg's for a BBQ today and you were loved up by all  :)  But, the exciting thing is that we got a photo of the 4 of us where were aren't in a hospital, my hair is done and we are all wearing "street clothes."  :)

As of this minute, you are curled up in a ball on your daddy's chest napping.  We had a rough night last night sleeping so I am hoping that it doesn't lead to you being up all night.  You look so darn cute all curled up over there.

Week 5

Hi Buddy!
You are now 5 weeks old.  Daddy went back to work this week so it was just you & me.  However, we had lots of help!  Gramma Debi D came over in the mornings to hang out with you while I did things around the house, napped or even just took a shower.  You snuggled up with her and slept and let her spoil you rotten.

You are starting to make more noises and get a bit of a personality.  You love to be held and snuggled.  You are very good natured - mostly, if you cry we go through a check list:  Diaper, food, swaddle, hold.  You are starting to sleep a bit more at night too.  I love it when you smile!  I think you have some dimples that appear when crack a bitty grin.

When we pick up Elijah, the daycare boys are so happy to see you.  They all just circle around your car seat and talk to you, touch you & love you up.  They are just waiting for you to come to daycare with them.

We have a lot going on the next few days.  We have a pool party tonight, a BBQ on Sunday, you are getting your pictures taken on Tuesday, follow up dr. appointment next week and I have a dr. appt on Friday.  In there, I hope we have lots of time together to make up for that NICU time where we didn't get to bond.  I hope we get some nap time together too  :)

Here are some photos of you from this past week.

Hi Joey,
Holy schmoly - you were quite an unhappy camper last night.  Your tummy was so upset that you cried for hours.  Then, you woke up you brother and he cried too.  We tried Tylenol, Mylicon, sugar water on a pacifier, and got you started on your milk of magnesium.  Something worked as you eventually calmed down but mommy & daddy are exhausted....  This parent of 2 thing is much more difficult than I anticipated.  It got to the point that we just started laughing as you two boys screamed at us!

Few photos that I didn't post yesterday.
These are our hospital discharge photos.

We went to the library last night for toddler story time and I took a few photos of you in your car seat.

Today, we took some photos for your birth announcements and got those ordered.

Finally...an update

Hi Joey!
Well, you kind of already knew that you were in line for 2nd child syndrome but I never thought it would be this bad!  You have been home for almost 5 days now and I still haven't posted anything on your blog!  You are darn near one month old.  I can't even believe it.  Yesterday, the pediatrician said "He is almost one month" and I was quite shocked to hear that.  In my eyes, you are like 5 days old because I have blacked out those 3.5 weeks that you spent at the hospital!

I have to be mushy for a minute, buddy.  I hate that your first month was almost entirely in a hospital.  I hate that I feel like we didn't get to bond like we should have.  I hate that I don't have daily posts for you during that time telling you all about your life with us.  But, I do love you and love the fact that you are FINALLY home!

You are quite a joy, buddy!  You are very good natured and you only cry when it is necessary.  You will cry to tell us to feed you or to change you.  You will also cry when you are tired of laying in one position and want to be held.  You love being held and you love sleeping on our tummies.  Yes, we already do have some bad habits.  You are also great with your brother - you don't cry at him when he pokes you or pets you or grabs you.  Thank you for that, little guy.  He loves you so much but he hasn't learned boundaries yet  :)

We are having a hard time adapting with our new family of 4.  I don't think we were prepared for what an upheaval it will be.  You need a bottle, Elijah needs dinner, mom and dad need an extra set of hands each.  We also need to figure out how to get some sleep in this house!  You wake up every 2-3 hours and Elijah wakes up every night at 2 am.  We need to figure out where every one is going to sleep.  You can't sleep in our bed if Elijah does.  We don't want you to wake each other up.  Lots of strategic decisions to be made.

We went to the pediatrician yesterday and you got an all clear.  You gained 3 oz since you were discharged.  You also measured 2" longer - you were 24".  WOW.  She said never to wake you up to eat - you will figure it out yourself.  We were so worried that you would lose weight and be back in the hospital that we woke you up twice the first night!  Now, you can sleep as much as you want.

Well buddy, life really is good.  Your daddy and I look at you and are just in awe that you are here.  You have met most of your local family and everyone is shocked at how much hair you have.  Your brother loves you a lot.  I take your photo everyday and will have them all scrapbooked even if they are not posted here.  I love smooching you up.  Your dad loves loving you up!

I am not sure when I will be back to talk to you buddy but we talk enough in person.  But, I will try to get back frequently enough to fill you in on all your activities and changes.  Eventually, I will probably even get you some photos posted!  I will leave you with the scrapbook pages I have done for you so far.

Another setback

Hi Joey,
You are killing us, just killing us!  As I type this, you are on another 48 hours of no food and you are a fussy pants because you are hungry.  But, you sure are cute when you are sleeping  :)

After I posted last, we did come up and visit you again on Father's Day.  We ended up having quite a heated discussion and it was the first time we have really gone against the medical team.  You had blown your IV and they couldn't find a place to put a new one.  Daddy walked in and they had 4 nurses holding you down looking for somewhere.  That pushed daddy over the edge and he lost it  :)  Luckily, we won that argument (after they called in a dr to come in from home) and you did not get poked again.  We upped your formula and you were IV free.  Gramma Debbie stayed the night with you while we spent some time with Elijah.

On Monday, it was status quo - just trying to get you to eat as much as possible.  We are trying a new schedule where I hang out with you from 8:30 - 5:30 then I grab Elijah while you hang out with daddy until 7:00 or so.  We feel like we get to cuddle with you a lot then hang out with Elijah too.

On Tuesday, I was disappointed when I walked in because you stopped eating again.  When daddy came at noon, he said he did not think you were feeling well at all.  We finally talked the dr into changing your formula to the allergenic mix - which is what we wanted you put on Saturday.  We thought your tummy was upset and that is why you quit eating.  He agreed and you perked up by 3.  However, daddy changed your diaper and there was blood again.  Daddy was mad because he thought they should have listened to us on Saturday.  I was not surprised as I was expecting it.  But, it is a large set back - another 48 hours of testing and no food.  The dr apologized for not listening to us and all of your tests are pointing towards the fact that you have a food allergy.  When you get the formula, it irritates your tummy or bowels so they bleed.  We just didn't get you switched fast enough to get ahead of it.

Since you needed an IV again, they decided to do a pic catheter instead.  This is an IV that goes into your veins a lot further so that you can't blow it or pull it out.  It was the best decision but, unfortunately, they had to stick you for 2 hours to get it to work.  It was very difficult on us knowing that you were in so much pain.  When they were finally done, we cuddled you and all the spirit was gone from you.  You just gave up fighting because you were being tortured so much.  It killed us buddy.  It kills us that you are going through so much pain and there is nothing that we can do about it except love you up afterwards.  We really wish there was something we could do to take the pain away from you.

As of now, you will have labs and xrays done again for 24 hours.  Then, once you hit 48 hours, they are going to do another test to make sure that all of your insides are formed OK so we can rule that out and be even more sure that it is a food allergy.  Once that is clear, we can resume feedings with the special formula and hope that your diapers are free from blood.  We are so hopeful that this is going to be the round where you are eating normal, you are not having discomfort and you have no more blood.  If that isn't the case, I think you will see us both more devastated than we have ever been.

On a positive note, the dr was completely impressed by your neck control.  You raise your head up and look around so intently.  He thought that was very mature for your age  :)

I was going to leave you with some photos but the internet won't let me so I will have to share next time. We love you buddy!

Father's Day

Hi Joey!
As I type this, you are still in the 3rd floor NICU hanging out with your daddy & I am home with your brother.  We have had a rough few days after your scare.  We had 48 hours of you not getting any food and you were a fussy pants because you were hungry!  We just tried to love you up as much as possible and get you through the crying stages.

Once you got cleared for food, you chugged 2  bottles of 20 cc immediately.  After that, you slowed down a bit.  You were kind of fidgety and gassy.  By the 4th bottle, you slept through it and we were really nervous.  You ate 10 then they put your feeding tube back in.  I have to be honest with you buddy, I lost hope at that point.  When you quit eating, I resigned myself to the fact that you were going to be in the NICU for 18 years.  :)  When I woke up, daddy happily reported that you had 3 feedings of 30 and you chugged them down.  So, I got a few more inklings of hope that you were doing OK.  We are waiting for the dr to do rounds and decide what your plan will be for today.  The dr had told us yesterday he expected you to progress from this point and be home mid-week but I am too scared to get my hopes up!

I have to keep it real with you buddy.  You being there and Elijah being elsewhere is really hard on your daddy and me.  If we are spending time with Elijah, we are feeling guilty that you are laying there alone in your crib in the NICU.  If we are spending time with you, we are feeling guilty that Elijah is being left alone without his mommy & daddy.  It is hard to get that time equal.  I can tell that Elijah is having a hard time of things.  He is very clingy, he is throwing tantrums and needs us too.  I worry that your first two weeks of life in the NICU is going to impact all your attachments and bonding for the rest of your life.  I know, I am silly and I think too much but all of these worries are in my mind and I just want you home  :)

In all of this turmoil, I did get some good photos of you this week.  Here is one of them.