Hi Elijah,
I am done playing games with your name. I have decided on Elijah/Eli. It is how I am going to communicate with you from now on. I suppose your dad could convince me otherwise but for now, I am done thinking about it. Middle name is up for grabs. I would like Lang but I will give it up to your dad if he will buy off on Elijah.
Want to know a secret? I think Eli has grown on your dad. He has called you Eli twice now! I was telling him yesterday that you can hear us and recognize our voices. I told him he needs to watch his mouth because you will come out, hear a cuss word and go "DADDY." Later, he started cussing in an Irish Brogue. He said "I can talk like that so Eli won't think it is me." Then, tonight, he was cooking us dinner. I bought a NY strip for him and 2 filets (they were on sale) for us. He starts yelling from the kitchen "How do you get 2 steaks and I get one? Eli needs his own steak?" haha.
You are 21+ weeks now. We are almost there buddy. I did some research on the internet and 23 weeks gives us a small chance. Each week after that, your chances of survival goes up and up. It is so close that we can almost touch it. You stay in there cooking and don't be so feisty that you kick your juice bag open!!
I asked your dad a question and was kind of surprised at his answer. I mockingly said to him "I think you are dropping your walls with this baby. He is real to you now." He answered back to me "Yes, I have been getting there the last couple of weeks." I bet it started when he started smooching you.
Well, as far as your mom goes, you are definitely real to me - no doubt about it. However, I swing back and forth on my emotions. On one hand, I am ready to buy your diapers and start on your room and spend hours thinking about you. On the other hand, I keep thinking "What if..." I suppose I need to commit 100% to you being healthy so that you get positive vibes. I was worried about you this morning and kind of down - totally irrational as there is no reason to be. Then, you started kicking up a storm. It was almost like you were telling me to buck up because you were fine. (As a side note - your cousin Brandi also gave me a kick-butt-buck-up lecture today too!) Later in the day, I was thinking about you or talking to you and I said Elijah. You started moving again. That was my final straw that I am done with changing your name.
I feel like I have lots more to tell you but I am going to call it a day. Will have more for you later this week.
